A Negative Result? Not Without a Valuable Process First
没有时间了。。。早知道我应该请假的。而不是一边实习， 一边做笔试的。。。
我花了非常多的时间 在 搜集资料 和 确认/创造设定上。。。因为我完全没接触过这个主体， 而且他们要求写实。 唉
以及 我做的真的好烂啊。 烂到我现在写blog 都不想再 写一笔了。
Tencent’s Games Introductory Course
Gotta say, this really is an introductory course: each session covers what the different branches of game art actually do. For example, what does a 3D character artist do? What makes a good 3D artist? That kind of thing.
Since I’ve already decided to go down the 3D character artist path, I don’t know much about other disciplines, like what TA does exactly, or what the animation team is busy with. This course was a great chance to fill in those gaps, and I got a lot out of it.
There’s one line the instructor said that really stuck with me: A 3D character artist plays a bridging role—connecting upstream with concept art and downstream with animation and TA. So, having a broad understanding of each discipline is a good thing
Key Notes:
- Make it production-ready. No matter how cool the idea or how flashy the technique, the final result has to actually run in the game. It can’t just be “impressive to look at.”
- Think commercially. Game development is an industry. You have to consider resource budgets, production timelines, and team collaboration—you can’t just geek out from an artist’s perspective alone.
- Keep improving. This industry changes quickly; tools change, aesthetics change. Stopping means falling behind.
总结来说就是，即便是一门“入门课”，只要带着自己的方向去听，也能挖到对自己有用的东西。了解其他分支不是为了转行，而是为了在自己这个位置上，做得更稳、更顺、更知道“下一步该往哪走”。
In conclusion, even an “introductory course” can offer valuable takeaways if you go in with your own direction in mind. Learning about other disciplines isn’t about switching paths, it’s about standing more firmly in your own role, working more smoothly, and having a clearer sense of where to go next.
Watched Tencent’s Live about How They Create 《Game for Peace 》
They walked through how the Game for Peace team starts from scratch: gathering references based on requirements and then creating a full outfit. Really interesting stuff.
Some Sketches & Sculpting :
After failing another test at the beginning of the month, my mood hit rock bottom. That familiar feeling of powerlessness overwhelmed me again. I couldn’t stop thinking: Why am I so bad at this? Why didn’t I seize the opportunity? Am I making the right choices or the wrong ones? What will happen to my future?
I wished someone could just give me the answer, like solving a test question. But life’s problems don’t come with answer keys.
I talked to my mom about it. She told me, “The fact that you’re choosing to carve out your own path is already impressive. What you’re going through isn’t about being right or wrong—it’s your experience, and it will help you face the next challenge better.”
But I was still so sad. I still couldn’t to think of questions like ‘Am I really just this terrible?’. I couldn’t even bring myself to pick up a pen again.
I also reached out to my DPS mentor, Dr Miriam Maliha, and asked if I could take a break. Even though the rules didn’t allow it, I’m grateful she encouraged me. My mom, my dad, my grandmother, my loyal companion Lele, my wonderful mentors—they all wove together a safety net that caught me when I was at my most fragile.
But still, the pain and depression themselves were really hard.
Anyway, I spiralled for a few days. Okay, maybe more than a few.
Then one day, I thought: if I can’t stand myself, if I feel like I’m not good enough, then I’ll just work harder. Study harder. Push forward. I don’t know what the future holds, but I feel like if I accumulate just a little bit every day, even just a tiny bit, I’ll have more confidence to face whatever comes. I don’t know what’s ahead, and I don’t know if my decisions are right, but I believe that if I hold on tighter to the present, there will be a way forward.
So I started making time to exercise, haha.
Honestly, all I want to do after work every day is sleep XD. But for my dreams, and to make sure I don’t miss the next opportunity, I can’t let drowsiness win!
I usually eat after getting home, but to avoid getting sleepy, I work for half an hour first before having dinner. It’s been working pretty well XD.
I even started a study group called “Did You Practice Modelling Today?” and added my parents to it so they can keep me accountable, haha.
This whole experience made me realise that when you’re at a low point, the hardest thing isn’t “pulling yourself together”—it’s allowing yourself to be caught first.
Family, mentors, even a cat who doesn’t understand anything but stays by your side—the safety net they weave isn’t meant to help you skip over the pain, but to make sure you don’t shatter when you fall.
And the moment you start climbing back up, it often isn’t some grand epiphany—it’s just something clicking one day. Instead of constantly asking “Am I good enough?”, it’s better to do one thing that makes tomorrow’s self feel like today wasn’t wasted. Even if it’s just a little. Even if you’re still carrying sadness.
It’s still moving forward.
Personal Things:
Another big thing this month was successfully handling my rental contract from overseas. I arranged for a moving company to put my stuff in a storage unit, and I got the full deposit back.
After so much back-and-forth with the agency, it’s finally resolved!
I’d actually prepaid a cleaning fee and asked the agency to arrange the cleaning, thinking it would reduce the chance of them deducting from my deposit. Then they emailed me saying the cleaning wasn’t up to standard and they’d be taking money out of the deposit. On top of that, they had my name wrong in the contract—Shuhan Wang turned into Seun Li.
I was like: ???
I paid rent for a whole year, and you couldn’t even save my name correctly? And I already paid for cleaning—your people didn’t do the job, and now you’re trying to charge me for it??
So began the endless back-and-forth. Dealing with time zones, email chains, screenshots as evidence… I was tweaking models at work, working on my written test, and writing emails to the agency on UK time all at once.
It dragged on for so long. There were moments I almost gave up and thought, “Fine, just take the money.” But every time that thought came up, I couldn’t let it go, as this wasn’t my fault, so why should I pay for their mistakes?
Finally, I got the full deposit back. When that email came through, I let out a huge sigh of relief. It felt like winning a battle no one else knew about.
I guess this is what being an adult is: handling work, handling life, and handling emotions all at once. Endless model revisions at work, endless disputes in life, and in the middle of it all, telling yourself, “it’s okay, take it slow.”
Honestly, I do miss the days when all I had to worry about was studying XD.
Cross-border, time zones, my name being wrong, getting blamed for a cleaning issue I already paid for—every step tested my patience and resilience.
There were so many times I wanted to just drop it, but every time I pushed through one more round, I got one step closer to that “full refund.”
Sure, having just schoolwork to worry about was nice, but being able to sort out these messy problems on my own? That’s pretty cool too. Even though the process was exhausting, haha.
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